Do women from OkCupid put out more, and does myBestFace work?

Anonymous writes:

I love your book: short and sweet. I came to the same conclusion on sending a generic first email, but was looking for someone who ran the experiment that I wanted to run. Now that I see you did it, I can rest easy.

Question: It makes sense that the women on match.com who are paid members would be more likely to respond and follow through on meeting you, but my how much more or less likely are they to put out quickly compared to the ones from say okcupid?

My theory would be that they are less likely to put out quickly because they are paying and expecting more commitment. But you actually have experience. Are there any noticeable differences?

He continues by offering a couple links on another topic from my book:

Okcupid myBestFace features is pretty useless:

http://jesse.la/okcupids-mybestface-would-be-awesome-if-it-worked/

https://www.joshsway.com/articles/view/stop-using-okcupids-mybestface

First of all, Mr. Anonymous, thanks for reading. I'm glad you like the book. How about a positive review on Amazon? Anyway now that that shameless promotion is out of the way, let's take these questions one at a time.

My WhatsYourPrice Adventure (Part 2)

So it's been a while since I've written about the online dating site for sugar daddies (ahem, generous men) and golddiggers (I mean, uh, women), What's Your Price. At the time I was intrigued by the prospects, but never got around to writing about the outcome of my adventure.

What happened? Well, honestly I figured out much more effective methods to meet women online, and no longer had any need for a gimmicky website like What's Your Price. But since so I've received so many requests to follow up my first piece, here it is, by popular demand, Part 2 of My What's Your Price Adventure.

Why Tinder Sucks

If you haven't heard of Tinder, you haven't been paying attention. It's the hottest thing in online dating. It's worth billions. I'm not going to bore you with all the details of how it works. You can learn that anywhere, but here are the main reasons Tinder is different, and why it's getting so much buzz:

1. It's not "really" online dating. Tinder has an organic feel. It uses your facebook contacts to link you with friends of friends.
2. It's entirely smartphone based, so is very comfortable and intuitive to people who are familiar with social apps. It doesn't feel like normal online dating.
3. It empowers women. Because you can't communicate with anyone until there's a mutual match, women feel empowered to control who gets to write them.

Yes all these things are true, but there's one fundamental flaw with Tinder that makes it almost entirely useless, completely inferior to virtually any other online dating site: It sucks. Here's how Tinder destroys online dating:

Announcing My New Book!

Dear loyal readers,

I’m ridiculously excited and disgustingly proud to announce the release of my new book A Hacker's Guide to Online Dating, How to Train Your Computer to Get You Dates. Available on Amazon here.

If you enjoy the blog, you’ll love this book. It’s everything I've learned throughout my years in the online dating world. All the tips and tricks on how to optimize the dating process to do what online dating is supposed to do – get you actual face to face dates – as efficiently as possible. Basically, overcoming the paradox of choice. I've even included the automation code that I personally developed and use to have my computer do most of the work for me. Online dating on steroids!

I’ll be posting excerpts periodically – there’s so much good material here that I’m not going to limit it to just the book - but to wet your whistle, the table of contents is below. I also want to do something for my loyal readers. For the next 5 days, the kindle ebook is going to be available absolutely free! No strings attached. The whole thing. Free. What are you waiting for? Here’s that link again. The only thing I ask in return is this: if you like it, give me a review on Amazon. It always helps. And let me know how my strategies work out for you. You can always reach me here in the comments section.

Vaya con dios,
Dorian

This week in...

...child support

• Who knew failing to pay child support could get you shot in the back by a police officer as you try to run away.
• I said it before, and I’ll say it again. See this film if you have the opportunity.
• A man pays child support for 16 years for a child that isn’t his.
  

...women

• For some reason, women just like to worry... and complain.
• We watch female sports if and when the athletes are hot, not for any other reason.

...dating, mating, and baboons

• It turns out, it’s pretty good to be No. 2.

9 more reasons (links)

1. If you don’t get married, you can still have a wonderful relationship with one of the world’s most beautiful people, raise a bunch of kids, and in general have a great life. Just ask Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie. Still not married.
2. You'll also be much less likely to have a woman cut your penis off, either figuratively or literally.
3. Nor will you be the victim of domestic violence at the hands of a raging psychopath like this woman who attacked the judge at her divorce hearing.
4. Christie Brinkley can tell you that marriage is ridiculous. Add her to the list of successful women who agree with me.
5. Those with experience think prostitution is just a form of dating. Actually, it's the other way around. Dating is a form of prostitution. And so is marriage!
6. You may have heard about the new trend of celebrating a divorce, but the truth is, there’s no such thing as an amicable divorce.
7. Why take yourself off the market when dating technology is advancing so rapidly? OkCupid is adding a location-based feature to its mobile app.
8. If you’re woman is going to manipulate you into proposing, what makes you think she won’t be manipulating you for the rest of your life?
9. We know child support isn't about the child, but this woman didn't get the memo. She's suing for child support 34 years later.

More dating technology

It's great when technology helps you get laid, isn't it? Now, a company is developing a system that will use facial recognition technology to determine the sex of people entering a bar. This data will then be aggregated to keep you apprised of which bars are hopping and the male-to-female ratio of each. Excellent!

Online dating sites, always innovating

You read about the new online dating site, What’s Your Price, where you can essentially buy a date. Well, the march of progress continues. Here are three more new online dating sites to consider:

Site: Clique
Summary: Here
Innovation: Leverages your existing social networks (Facebook, twitter, etc). Limits your potential dating connections to friends of friends, i.e., 2-degrees of separation.
Availability: only in NYC
Cost: Free for now
My take: Sounds interesting. This is the way people usually meet organically. The problem with most new online dating innovations is that it takes time to broaden the user base past the critical mass that makes it work. This site gets past that by integrating your existing networks. Hopefully it’s discreet. That’s the biggest barrier to most online dating sites integrating with Facebook. No one wants a Facebook update that says, “I just joined an online dating site.”

Site: Date My School
Summary: Here
Innovation: Exclusively for college students
Availability: A select number of schools and expanding
Cost: ??
My take: Again, this is how a lot of people meet -- in class/at school -- so why not take it online. At least you know the people there (a) are in a similar age group, (b) live very close by, and (c) are not total losers (at least they’re pursuing a college degree). But to me, it seems too narrow a focus. What do I do after I’ve looked through the 20 or so people at my school who meet my criteria for major, interests, etc and haven’t found anyone I want to date?

Site: Sugar Daddy for Me
Summary: The name says it all
My take: This site faces the same issues as What’s Your Price. In fact, this site might be in a less secure legal position. A California D.A. is currently hot on its trail. Let me help to answer the question of whether or not this is prostitution. Yes, it is. But so is marriage… almost all dates… and most romantic interactions between men and women.

Online dating trifecta: beautiful people, iPhone hookers, Zoosk statistics

1. Beautiful People an online dating site that only allows, you guessed it, beautiful people, had to lay down the law on 30,000 “uglies.” Good for them.
2. Apparently iWhores may be in our future. Ah, the march of progress.
3. New research from Zoosk on summer dating (I guess they were jealous of OkCupid). Here are the takeaways:
• Don’t talk about your ex on a first date. (Duh)
• The large majority of people expect men to pick up the bill for first date. (I guess you aren’t THAT independent, huh ladies?)
• Most women have made up their mind about a potential romantic interest by the end of the first date. For most men it takes less than an hour, some only 15 minutes. (Me? 15 seconds.)
• The majority of singles think an outdoor date is best for summer. (Not on the first date. See rule #2.)
• Very few people think karaoke is a good idea on a first date. (Ya think?)
• Most men, but less than half of women would go on date that requires a bathing suit. (My advice: not on the first date. Again, see rule #2. But it can be a good way to find out what you want to know. If she won’t show you her body, you probably don’t want to see it.)

What's Your Price: Prostitution or a good deal?

How much do I usually spend on a first date with a woman I’ve met online? And how often is it a total waste when she turns out to be either unattractive or uninterested? These are the questions I was asking myself after hearing about a new online dating site called What’s Your Price. It’s a new model where the suitors bid on what they'll pay to go on a date with the object of their affection.

My first thought: Is this a site for prostitutes or golddiggers... or both? But then I started thinking, maybe it’s not such a bad idea when you consider all the money I’ve wasted on bad dates. The average price of a What's Your Price date in my area (Los Angeles) is about $170 (not including the cost of the actual date), and the available women seem to be attractive, and let’s just say, “looking for a good time.”

It shouldn’t be to difficult to run a few numbers. But first, another question: How is this even legal? Isn’t this prostitution?

4 more reasons (links)

1. Apple’s working on a proprietary iPhone dating app.
2. Apparently there’s also such a thing as a deadbeat Mom.
3. If you’re going to be in Seattle on June 25, show up for the public forum on child support laws.
4. Scientific American has an in depth report on the science of modern fatherhood. Lot's of good stuff. I'll have more in a separate post.